Friday, December 16, 2011

My Life Really Isn't So Bad....

I have a lot to be grateful for. I know that. I recognize that fact quite often in my life. But lately, I've been a bit dragged down with a few difficulties that popped up at the same time. It has been a yucky week.

One of them being...we need a new roommate badly. We've been looking for a couple of months now, and we've even had a few potentials, but nothing has panned out. Now we're looking at moving out. My roommate would have to move home--which she really doesn't want to do. And I don't know where I would go. I don't have anywhere to go.

And that scares me...a lot. Like panic inducing.

The last few years have been filled with me searching for roommates. Not fun. Seriously. It's really, really frustrating. I've always been able to find one, or find some place new to live, but it's never been this close to actually not happening. Basically I have 30 days to find someone new. We're even putting in notice that we're moving.

My roommate and I went over the lease the other night and realized how much we're going to have to do to move out. Our prior roommates had done a lot of painting and so we're going to have to do a lot of un-painting. Yucky. And we have to deep clean 5 years of dirt, grime, and dust. No bueno.

I'm feeling really overwhelmed.

I'm tired of being the one that gets stuck behind. Stuck with cleaning and emptying the house/apartment. Stuck with scrambling to deal with what to do with my stuff.

Now would be a great time for Heavenly Father to answer my desperate prayers for a roommate so I don't have to be homeless.

This isn't a very fun time of year to be stressed out either.

But then I get phone calls from my clients who have no income and families to feed and provide shelter. It puts things into a bit of perspective. And then I learned that a friend of mine's husband has cancer. They found out 3 weeks after they got married. Yeah...

I have a lot to be grateful for. I'm healthy. My family is healthy. My sister is having a baby in a week (or so) and she has had an easy pregnancy. I have a job. And I can cover my bills (as long as I find a roommate).

I don't mean to be a big complainer, but this is what has been going on this week. I'm keepin' it real. I literally have been taking it one day at a time. It's a really good thing that the christmas presents are done because I am not motivated to work on any projects.

Last night I went to the temple, hoping to feel better and maybe have a solution magically pop into my head.

I did feel a little better, but no solution. I read my scriptures while I was there, flipping through them. Oddly each of the verses that I was able to actually absorb were talking about the people that fight against Zion will fail. I mean, I read that verse in the every page I flipped to in my scriptures. Weird, right? Yeah...that doesn't have much to do with the roommate situation. Though, interestingly, it did make me feel better about another issue I have to deal with soon.

I think the take away lesson from my visit to the Temple was the feeling that somehow things will work out they way they are supposed to. But I don't know what way that is, and I don't know if I'll like it when I do find out.

But I do know that it will work out. Some how.

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